OOM: Beckett's Room

[trigger_man]

 [After this.]

Jack makes a quick pit stop in his room to change into dry clothes, already feeling the burn on his skin as it warms up again.

Heading back out into the hall, he hesitates for a second outside Beckett's door.  After the awkwardness of him falling on top of her--and neither of them moving for a moment--this might not be the best idea.  But then he'd told her he'd be there in a moment, as as much as part of him has misgivings about it, there's part of him that wants to show that whatever that moment outside had been, it was just an aberration; nothing to see here, move along.

Taking a breath, he raps decisively on her door.

Comments

[trigger_man]

Jack's mouth thins for a moment. "Yeah, now you know how I feel when you tell me you're dealing with a dangerous case."

[fanofthegenre]

"It's not exactly the same thing," she says, giving him a pointed look.

Not that she even needs to mention the difference.

[trigger_man]

"No, but it's not exactly easy for me to listen when you tell me not to worry. Especially after you ended up running in here with an explosion chasing you."

He puts his hot chocolate down on the coffee table.

"Besides, I don't need you making me into some kind of obligation. Like I said, you don't need to worry about me."

[fanofthegenre]

"When did I ever say you were an obligation?" Beckett asks, genuinely taken aback.

"I know you don't want me to worry. Just like I don't want you to." She sits forward, clasping her hands in front of her.

"But I can't exactly help it."

[trigger_man]

"At least I worry about you when there's some kind of clear and present danger. If you worry about me because I'm alone, it'll be a full-time job."

He cuts his eyes at her for a moment. "Besides, in case you hadn't noticed, I'm not the best with people. Being alone is kind of a natural extension of that."

[fanofthegenre]

"A certain level of alone time is natural. It's normal. I'm not about to begrudge you that," she tells him.

"But when you're alone more often than not, when that starts to become the norm - you'd better just get used to the fact that I'm going to want to make sure it doesn't happen with you. Because you're my friend, Jack."

She almost moves to reach out, and then stops, fingers curling in against her thigh.

"And because I care about you."

[trigger_man]

"You said it yourself, earlier: too late," Jack says with a grim smile. "I spent a year and a half with everyone thinking I was dead. It's been nine months out there since I got back, and I've been moving from place to place. I'm not even using my real name at the moment. And I'm--" saying he's 'fine' is a bit too much of a lie at the moment, so instead he finishes with, "coping."

[fanofthegenre]

"Coping is good," she says, nodding encouragingly.

"And, well, you're not alone here. You're even in a place where I can keep an eye on you. So, this is me, telling you I'm a lot less worried now. Although that might change in the foreseeable future if you start giving me more reasons to be."

[trigger_man]

"Don't worry, I won't."

While he hasn't been able to stop having some of the reactions he's had since getting back from China--the paranoia, the panic attacks, the worst moments of depression--he has gotten better at hiding them. Knowing when he's about to have a panic attack and finding somewhere no one will see him, pasting on a poker face and steadying his hands when he's jumping out of his skin because it feels like he's being watched. If he doesn't want Beckett to worry about him, he's pretty sure he can hide how he's really doing, most of the time at least.

[fanofthegenre]

"Mmhmm."

She's still eyeing him for a moment, though, before she rises from the couch to tend to the fire, reaching for the poker and prodding a few of the logs around to keep it going.

"It's easy to forget this place is what it is sometimes," Beckett murmurs, thinking out loud. "How it introduces people from completely different worlds."

After another beat, she rejoins him on the couch, sitting sideways, leaning her arm against the back of the couch and resting her head in her hand.

"It's not so much of a stretch to wonder if we would've met had we lived in the same one, is it? Given what we do."

[trigger_man]

Jack leans back against the couch cushions, idly rubbing his left thumb over the scarring on the back of his right hand.

"I'm not sure you'd want to have met me through work, if we lived in the same world. Probably wouldn't be under very good circumstances."

[fanofthegenre]

"Maybe not," she realizes. She doesn't know the half of Jack's work history, but from the snippets of what she does know, she's not very eager to learn the rest any time soon - even though a part of her remains curious.

"Plus, any time we bring in outside help, I really tend to clash with the team leaders," Beckett adds, smirking over at him.

"I guess I just have trouble relinquishing control of the situation."

[trigger_man]

"Why does that not surprise me?" Jack says, glancing over at her with a wry expression. "Nothing I haven't dealt with before, though. You'd be surprised how many people get pissy about the experts at counter-terrorism taking over when there are lives at stake."

[fanofthegenre]

"Oh, so you're the expert now, huh?"

She's clearly baiting him at this point, mostly in an attempt to bring the conversation back to a lighter place, but she doesn't mind poking a little fun at him in the process.

He can handle it.

[trigger_man]

He can tell she's teasing, and he's glad to shift the conversation off himself.

"I think that considering L.A. is still standing in my world, CTU has the right to call itself the experts in the field, at least when it comes to dealing with local law enforcement. Even if it wasn't without some losses."

[fanofthegenre]

"Alright. You get points for keeping the city in one piece. I guess," she adds, as if she's reluctant to concede that much.

"But I'm only mildly impressed, Jack Bauer."

[trigger_man]

"You're a hard woman to please, Kate Beckett," he says with what might just be a small smile.

[fanofthegenre]

"Not always," she says, an easy chuckle escaping her lips.

[trigger_man]

Jack snorts. "In rare situations. I have a hard time believing that most of the time."

[fanofthegenre]

"Maybe you just haven't managed it yet," she shoots back, hiding a grin.

[trigger_man]

"Oh yeah? Any ideas how I can do that?" Jack asks. "You know I like a challenge."

It's only just dawns on him as he finishes saying that just how someone could interpret this conversation.

[fanofthegenre]

"You're a smart man," she murmurs, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

"I think you can come up with something pretty damn impressive."

[trigger_man]

"I uh, might have to think about that one for a while," Jack says with a slight hesitation.

[fanofthegenre]

"Well, while you take the time you need to think about that," Beckett replies, "I'm going to get some more cocoa."

She gets up from the couch, reaching out for her mug.

"You want?"

[trigger_man]

He'd pretty much forgotten about his mug, and he picks it up. "I'm good, thanks."