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[After this.]
Jack makes a quick pit stop in his room to change into dry clothes, already feeling the burn on his skin as it warms up again.
Heading back out into the hall, he hesitates for a second outside Beckett's door. After the awkwardness of him falling on top of her--and neither of them moving for a moment--this might not be the best idea. But then he'd told her he'd be there in a moment, as as much as part of him has misgivings about it, there's part of him that wants to show that whatever that moment outside had been, it was just an aberration; nothing to see here, move along.
Taking a breath, he raps decisively on her door.
Jack makes a quick pit stop in his room to change into dry clothes, already feeling the burn on his skin as it warms up again.
Heading back out into the hall, he hesitates for a second outside Beckett's door. After the awkwardness of him falling on top of her--and neither of them moving for a moment--this might not be the best idea. But then he'd told her he'd be there in a moment, as as much as part of him has misgivings about it, there's part of him that wants to show that whatever that moment outside had been, it was just an aberration; nothing to see here, move along.
Taking a breath, he raps decisively on her door.
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"He may have gotten to keep one," she adds, before quickly taking a sip of cocoa.
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After a moment, she leans back, relaxing further, staring into the flickering flames.
"What about you? Anything new and exciting to share?"
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"Not really. Couple days before Christmas outside, and the resort I'm working at is getting pretty busy."
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"I get the feeling you're not exactly big on the holidays."
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At one time he had, at least somewhat; when he had Kim to celebrate with. But then Christmas is a time for family, and it's been years since he had one.
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She takes another sip of cocoa.
"Probably because I can't remember the last time I didn't work through Christmas."
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She draws a face, shrugging.
"Life of a cop."
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Some years Christmas felt more like a gauntlet for CTU to run through, to make sure nothing happened.
"Even I got a couple Christmases off, though. Or nearly off."
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"Okay. I've decided. If I don't get Christmas off back home, I'm just going to have to spend it here. Then at least I'll get some semblance of a break."
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Maybe it's because he's been thinking about Kim so much, but the thought of Beckett not seeing her father much on Christmas isn't a comfortable one. Though he knows too, that there's a number of good reasons she could have for it; he can't blame Kim when it comes to her reasons for not wanting to see him.
"I'll probably be in here for a while anyway; at least much as I can without stopping time from passing out there or getting fired for not doing my job."
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"And you better. I don't like to think about the possibility of you being - "
Beckett nearly stops herself from finishing the sentence, but the sentiment is already there; there's nothing she can do about that now.
" - well, alone," she murmurs.
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Especially when trouble seems to follow you around.
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"Too late," she replies, with a small sigh.
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Not that she even needs to mention the difference.
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He puts his hot chocolate down on the coffee table.
"Besides, I don't need you making me into some kind of obligation. Like I said, you don't need to worry about me."
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"I know you don't want me to worry. Just like I don't want you to." She sits forward, clasping her hands in front of her.
"But I can't exactly help it."
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He cuts his eyes at her for a moment. "Besides, in case you hadn't noticed, I'm not the best with people. Being alone is kind of a natural extension of that."
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"But when you're alone more often than not, when that starts to become the norm - you'd better just get used to the fact that I'm going to want to make sure it doesn't happen with you. Because you're my friend, Jack."
She almost moves to reach out, and then stops, fingers curling in against her thigh.
"And because I care about you."
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"And, well, you're not alone here. You're even in a place where I can keep an eye on you. So, this is me, telling you I'm a lot less worried now. Although that might change in the foreseeable future if you start giving me more reasons to be."
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While he hasn't been able to stop having some of the reactions he's had since getting back from China--the paranoia, the panic attacks, the worst moments of depression--he has gotten better at hiding them. Knowing when he's about to have a panic attack and finding somewhere no one will see him, pasting on a poker face and steadying his hands when he's jumping out of his skin because it feels like he's being watched. If he doesn't want Beckett to worry about him, he's pretty sure he can hide how he's really doing, most of the time at least.